when ur eating dinner at your friends house
and their parents start arguing
and you want to ask for the salt
but the salt is right in between their upcoming divorce
i love this bible verse
this is my kink where do I find this guy
fun fact: a few hours after posting this to my tumblr the guy sent me a message frantically demanding i take this down. he didn’t want to be famous on the internet, he said, and girls from tumblr were harassing him.
a month later he sent me a message thanking me, and saying i got him laid.
ALMOST THE SAME
If we’re dating and you don’t let me pretend to play bongo drums on your butt then guess what? We’re through
What are you so afraid of!?
I’m REALLY sorry but it looks like they’re about to rap battle
looking at my blog like
PEOPLE WHO BUMP THE DESK WHILE YOU’RE DRAWING/WRITING
when you see something you wanna reblog but refresh the page
Gordon Ramsay is my favorite.
i just want to hug all of them
Fun story. I cooked for this dude, once. I did my kitchen apprenticeship at the family-style restaurant of one of New Zealand’s premiere chefs, and he knew Ramsay really well. He was in New Zealand for a few weeks, and Martin brought him by the restaurant to check it out. It was right on the beach, fucking gorgeous. I was the only one there (apprentice = bitch work = 4am starting shifts), and they asked me to whip up some breakfast for them. It was SUPER simple, fried fish, eggs cooked in bread, sausages. He was incredibly gracious and kind, asked me to join them (I couldn’t, too much work to do, so they sat at the kitchen window so they could talk to me), and was super interested in hearing about my english grandma, who had taught me how to cook. I won’t hear a single bad word against this man, for all of his kitchen hysterics, he treated me like an equal.
Stephen King being Stephen King
this will always be funny
once i was babysitting my neighbor’s 6 year old and she asked me why i was so ugly and without thinking i said “i’m you from the future” and she cried for like 30 minutes